Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's Maybeline! Maybe it's confidence, maybe she's worked her ass off for it!
Where does confidence come from?
When I was doing interview consulting for pilots I saw a wide range of differences in confidence. Military vs. civilian, male vs female and even cultural differences. Some pilots drip with confidence (as we'd like them to), some pilots faked it well and some pilots couldn't even spell the word! I loved doing interview consulting, I called it pilot beauty school because it was like finishing school for those going off to the ‘Bigs’. I'd polish up their resume one last time, go through their log books and airline application to make sure nothing was missing and that it was mistake free. During our mock interviews we would bring forth the highlights of their background, clean up any jargon, subtract too many family details, and take responsibility for any failed checkrides. I would bring out a personable and authentic pilot as opposed to a robot spewing rehearsed answers- like I said true beauty school!
One question that kept coming up for me was what do we do with those pilots who needed more than our 2-4 hour service? Those who needed an additional class on confidence to include body language, eye contact, and a confident voice. Why did some have it and some lacked it? And this is where I started asking others about where their confidence comes from. Most of the people interviewed don't believe you're born with confidence. They think it comes from hard work and experience. That it comes from knowing the airplane systems “three levels” deep as Brittany, a military C-17 pilot and Captain with Republic Airlines describes. Kate a C-130 pilot, says that she has to work twice as hard as her male counterparts. Deidre, a Southwest first officer doesn't think she was born with confidence but that there are a lot of strong personality traits a pilot needs like strong decision-making, type A personality, and good leadership.
It was commonly reported that confidence arose from overcoming failures. And this answer has blown my mind because we certainly are not raised to view failure as a positive thing. But over and over during my #50flygirlinterviews I have heard that failure has been the root of success- to try harder, be better and keep going.
Experience + Success = Confidence
The definition of confidence is the feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities. It comes from the Latin word ‘fidere’ which means to trust. Having self-confidence is having trust in one self.
But guess what else I learned? Self-confidence is different from self-esteem and that’s a whole new blog post!
Tips for Confidence
01 : Stand up tall, chin up, shoulders back.
02 : Write a list of where you have succeeded in the past.
03 : Fake it till you make it; your confidence will catch up with up you.
04 : Visualize yourself achieving the goals you set.
